They say that laughter is the best medicine. If your heart is aching because you got rejected for, say, the 25th time, don’t worry, there are plenty of fish in the ocean. Here’s my online dating advice to you, take a dose of these jokes and never call me in the morning. For sure, after a few good laughs you’ll be back on your feet and face as many rejections as you can until you get that “yes” you’ve been waiting for.
What Women Say (And What They Really Mean)
I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of every banjo-playing geek on “Hee Haw.”)
There’s a slight difference in our ages. (You are one Jurassic geezer.)
I’m not attracted to you in that way. (You are the ugliest dork I have ever laid eyes upon.)
My life is too complicated right now. (I’m waiting for a rich sugar daddy.)
I’ve got a boyfriend. (I’d rather stay home alone.)
I don’t date men where I work. (Hey, bud, I wouldn’t even date you if you were in the same solar system, much less the same building.)
It’s not you, it’s me. (It’s not me, it’s you.)
I’m concentrating on my career. (Even something as boring as my job has got to be better than dating you.)
I’m celibate. (One look at you and I’m ready to swear off men altogether.)
Let’s be friends. (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and fall in love with.)
What Men Say (And What They Really Mean)
I think of you as a sister. (You’re ugly.)
There’s a slight difference in our ages. (You’re ugly.)
I’m not attracted to you in that way. (You’re ugly.)
My life is too complicated right now. (You’re ugly.)
I’ve got a girlfriend. (You’re ugly.)
I don’t date women where I work. (You’re ugly.)
It’s not you, it’s me. (You’re ugly.)
I’m concentrating on my career. (You’re ugly.)
I’m celibate. (You’re ugly.)
Let’s be friends. (You’re ugly.)
I hope these jokes took away the pain in your heart. If not, there’s plenty more where these jokes came from. Just click the link and give yourself a joke overdose until your heart feels better.
